{"id":8602,"date":"2020-06-26T12:37:34","date_gmt":"2020-06-26T17:37:34","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thedisciplemaker.org\/?p=8602"},"modified":"2020-06-26T12:37:34","modified_gmt":"2020-06-26T17:37:34","slug":"learning-to-listen","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.navpress.com\/sites\/thedisciplemaker\/2020\/06\/learning-to-listen\/","title":{"rendered":"Learning to Listen"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"bsf_rt_marker\"><\/div>\n<p>At the heart of Mentoring Communities is the art of listening: wholly and holy listening.<\/p>\n\n\n<p>The late, respected management guru Peter Drucker asserted that the first leadership competence is the willingness to listen. And in <em>Leaders<\/em>, Warren Bennis wrote that \u201cThe leader must be a superb listener . . . successful leaders we have found are great askers and they do pay attention.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n<p>Yet listening has often been overlooked as a key attribute of leaders. I remember spending time with several well-known leaders when I was young in ministry. After long conversations, I realized that I knew everything they did, but they knew almost nothing about me! They never asked a question. Starting then, I determined to be a listener to others\u2014later, I made a practice of particularly listening to younger leaders.<\/p>\n\n\n<h2>Listening in Mentoring<\/h2>\n\n\n<p>If listening is of great value for leaders in any field, it is especially so for those of us who are sensing a call to mentor younger leaders who seek guidance while serving God\u2019s Kingdom purposes.<\/p>\n\n\n<p>We are called to serve as a community of friends on the journey\u2014followers, companions, and learners\u2014together in the way of Christ. We are followers of Christ as our leader, and the way home to the Father. We are companions with those who seek to lead like Jesus and to lead others to him. We are learners helping each other to grow in the art of Spiritual Mentoring.<\/p>\n\n\n<p>If this is our call and practice, then we indeed need to become a community of \u201csuperb listener[s]\u201d who are \u201cgreat askers\u201d and who \u201cpay attention.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n<p>A central mark of our community is a commitment to help each other listen: to God, to our own hearts, and to each other.<\/p>\n\n\n<p>Spiritual mentoring is not a program, a technique, or a profession. It is an art: the art of listening to and with others in the presence of Holy God.<\/p>\n\n\n<p>As the Celtic spiritual leader Aelred described times of holy listening in the presence of God: \u201cYou and I are here, and I hope that Christ is between us as a third.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n<p>Spiritual mentoring is a gift from God, for others\u2014a gift of listening.<\/p>\n\n\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-coblocks-click-to-tweet\"><p class=\"wp-block-coblocks-click-to-tweet__text\">Spiritual mentoring is not a program, a technique, or a profession. It is an art: the art of listening to and with others in the presence of Holy God.<\/p><a class=\"wp-block-coblocks-click-to-tweet__twitter-btn has-button-color\" style=\"background-color:#d19f2a\" href=\"http:\/\/twitter.com\/share?&amp;text=Spiritual%20mentoring%20is%20not%20a%20program%2C%20a%20technique%2C%20or%20a%20profession.%20It%20is%20an%20art%3A%20the%20art%20of%20listening%20to%20and%20with%20others%20in%20the%20presence%20of%20Holy%20God.&amp;url=https:\/\/www.navpress.com\/sites\/thedisciplemaker\/learning-to-listen\/&amp;via=NavPress\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Tweet<\/a><\/blockquote>\n\n\n<p>Like any art, Spiritual Mentoring is also a practice, an attitude of the ear, mind, heart, and soul. And we can learn through practicing the gift.<\/p>\n\n\n<p>The mentoring ministry for emerging leaders is a time of listening together so together we may discern God\u2019s calling for the mentors and the emerging leaders in the great task of world evangelization.<\/p>\n\n\n<h2>God Speaks, We Listen, Then We Speak<\/h2>\n\n\n<p>The entire Bible is the record of God speaking in human history and calling on his people to listen. Isaiah provided this remarkable insight:<\/p>\n\n\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote\"><p>The Lord GOD has given me<br \/>the tongue of a teacher,<br \/>that I may know how to sustain<br \/>the weary with a word.<br \/>Morning by morning he wakens\u2014<br \/>wakens my ear<br \/>to listen as those who are taught.<br \/>The Lord GOD has opened my ear,<br \/>and I was not rebellious,<br \/>I did not turn backward.<\/p><cite><em>Isaiah 50:4-5<\/em><\/cite><\/blockquote>\n\n\n<p>God wakes us first to listen, then to have a word for others. What is this word that sustains the weary? It is the word that is apt, right, timely, helpful, convicting, and sustaining. I think of many words that sustained me just when I needed them from friends and loved ones.<\/p>\n\n\n<p>They came from people whose ears God had wakened and whose tongues God had instructed. In the passage from Isaiah, notice how divine guidance is offered not merely for our lives but to help our weary fellow traveler.<\/p>\n\n\n<p>I know that God has given me this \u201cword\u201d at times for those who come for spiritual direction. I also know it has come from what I myself have learned and lived, especially through the hard times.<\/p>\n\n\n<h2>Learning to Listen<\/h2>\n\n\n<p>One of our greatest needs is to learn active and attentive listening. I like to think I am a good listener, yet I have often found it difficult to listen attentively. This is true in part because when I was a child, my mother punished me by lecturing me, often and at length, so that I learned to daydream and let my mind wander. I have learned that listening takes much practice.<\/p>\n\n\n<p>If we want to be effective servants and helpful leaders, we must learn to listen to God, to those close to us, to strangers, and to our own hearts.<\/p>\n\n\n<p>Listening to our own hearts. \u201cPraying is first and foremost listening to Jesus who dwells in the very depths of your heart,\u201d wrote Nouwen. Every day, we need to set aside some time for active listening to God.<\/p>\n\n\n<p>Listening to others. This is one of the greatest gifts we can give. When I listen carefully, with thoughtful attention, not to frame a reply but to understand, I am saying, \u201cWhat you think and feel is important because God takes you seriously, and so do I!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-coblocks-click-to-tweet\"><p class=\"wp-block-coblocks-click-to-tweet__text\">If we want to be effective servants and helpful leaders, we must learn to listen to God, to those close to us, to strangers, and to our own hearts.<\/p><a class=\"wp-block-coblocks-click-to-tweet__twitter-btn has-button-color\" style=\"background-color:#d19f2a\" href=\"http:\/\/twitter.com\/share?&amp;text=If%20we%20want%20to%20be%20effective%20servants%20and%20helpful%20leaders%2C%20we%20must%20learn%20to%20listen%20to%20God%2C%20to%20those%20close%20to%20us%2C%20to%20strangers%2C%20and%20to%20our%20own%20hearts.&amp;url=https:\/\/www.navpress.com\/sites\/thedisciplemaker\/learning-to-listen\/&amp;via=NavPress\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Tweet<\/a><\/blockquote>\n\n\n<p>Listening in sharing our faith. Speaking skills are important in witnessing to others, but so are listening skills. An engineer described evangelism as \u201clistening in on the conversation between someone and the Holy Spirit and speaking when given permission by that person and the Holy Spirit.\u201d As Keith Miller put it, when we listen carefully to another, it is like running our fingers around the rim of a cup until we come to a cracked place\u2014the place of need\u2014where we can help them to connect to Jesus.<\/p>\n\n\n<p>Listening to those we lead. As Drucker and Bennis said, the best leaders know how to listen. They don\u2019t just talk about \u201cmy vision\u201d but about \u201cour vision\u201d because they have listened, and the vision is owned and shared by others.<\/p>\n\n\n<p>To listen to God in his Word and through his Spirit\u2014to our own hearts and to others\u2019\u2014is crucial. Spiritual mentors must be good listeners.<\/p>\n\n\n<p>So let my prayer and yours be: Lord, teach me to listen.<\/p>\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\" \/>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-coblocks-author\"><figure class=\"wp-block-coblocks-author__avatar\"><img class=\"wp-block-coblocks-author__avatar-img\" src=\"https:\/\/www.navpress.com\/sites\/thedisciplemaker\/wp-content\/uploads\/MORSE-Author-Photo-bordered.png\" alt=\"MaryKate Morse\" \/><\/figure><div class=\"wp-block-coblocks-author__content\"><span class=\"wp-block-coblocks-author__name\">MaryKate Morse<\/span><p class=\"wp-block-coblocks-author__biography\">This excerpt is from <a href=\"https:\/\/bit.ly\/31jlRK4\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><strong><em>Lifelong Leadership: Woven Together through Mentoring Communities<\/em><\/strong><\/a> by <a rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" href=\"https:\/\/www.navpress.com\/sites\/thedisciplemaker\/tag\/marykate-morse\/\" target=\"_blank\"><strong>MaryKate Morse<\/strong><\/a>. Read an excerpt from the book <strong><a rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" href=\"https:\/\/bit.ly\/2xKupNG\" target=\"_blank\">here<\/a><\/strong>. You can purchase the book at your favorite bookstore. Order from <a href=\"https:\/\/bookshop.org\/books\/lifelong-leadership-woven-together-through-mentoring-communities\/9781641580175\"><strong>bookshop.org<\/strong><\/a>, an online bookseller that supports independent bookstores. <a rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" href=\"https:\/\/bit.ly\/2xKupNG\" target=\"_blank\"><em><strong>Lifelong Leadership<\/strong><\/em><\/a> is also available at <strong><a rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" href=\"https:\/\/bit.ly\/2Lb5VjP\" target=\"_blank\">navpress.com<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n<div class=\"wp-block-button\"><a class=\"wp-block-button__link\" href=\"https:\/\/www.navpress.com\/sites\/thedisciplemaker\/tag\/marykate-morse\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">More from Mary Kate<\/a><\/div>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"aligncenter size-large is-resized\"><a href=\"https:\/\/bit.ly\/31jlRK4\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><img src=\"https:\/\/www.navpress.com\/sites\/thedisciplemaker\/wp-content\/uploads\/LifelongLeadership_PNG-833x1024.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-8143\" width=\"360\" \/><\/a><\/figure><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>At the heart of Mentoring Communities is the art of listening: wholly and holy listening. The late, respected management guru Peter Drucker asserted that the first leadership competence is the willingness to listen. And in Leaders, Warren Bennis wrote that &#8230; <\/p>\n<p class=\"read-more-container\"><a title=\"Learning to Listen\" class=\"read-more button\" href=\"https:\/\/www.navpress.com\/sites\/thedisciplemaker\/2020\/06\/learning-to-listen\/#more-8602\">Read more<span class=\"screen-reader-text\">Learning to Listen<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":12,"featured_media":8606,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_coblocks_attr":"","_coblocks_dimensions":"","_coblocks_responsive_height":"","_coblocks_accordion_ie_support":"","_FSMCFIC_featured_image_caption":"","_FSMCFIC_featured_image_nocaption":"","_FSMCFIC_featured_image_hide":""},"categories":[8],"tags":[325,330,346,351],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v20.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Learning to Listen - The Disciplemaker<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.navpress.com\/sites\/thedisciplemaker\/2020\/06\/learning-to-listen\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Learning to Listen - The Disciplemaker\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"At the heart of Mentoring Communities is the art of listening: wholly and holy listening. 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