{"id":8711,"date":"2020-10-19T16:10:18","date_gmt":"2020-10-19T21:10:18","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thedisciplemaker.org\/?p=8711"},"modified":"2022-03-22T21:03:55","modified_gmt":"2022-03-22T21:03:55","slug":"how-the-unpopular-girl-taught-me-jesus-love","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.navpress.com\/sites\/thedisciplemaker\/2020\/10\/how-the-unpopular-girl-taught-me-jesus-love\/","title":{"rendered":"How the Unpopular Girl Taught Me Jesus&#8217; Love"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"bsf_rt_marker\"><\/div>\n<p>I&#8217;m a therapist. My first client for the day was 16 years old.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Her year has been one of bone-aching loneliness as she\u2019s tried to find her place among her peers, hang on to her values, and not seem too weird. Her high-school r\u00e9sum\u00e9 lacked a lot of the achievements the adolescent world requires (and maybe it\u2019s not just the adolescent world). She isn\u2019t popular. She doesn\u2019t wear trendy fashions. She\u2019s never been asked on a date. She doesn\u2019t even have Snapchat on her phone. Her reputation is as \u201ca Goody-Two-Shoes\u201d only the teachers like. She cried every time she told me about her incredibly painful high-school story and asked how she could change it. I encouraged her to be true to who God made her to be, and yet I knew those are words adults say when we don\u2019t really know what to say.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Her visit to see me on this day was right after the second semester of the school year started. She walked into my office with joy and confidence. If I didn\u2019t know better, I would think she was voted prom queen. I suspected she was just relieved to be halfway out of the hell of high school. I was wrong.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Danielle explained to me that she\u2019d decided to do something with all her grief and pain over being unfairly judged and excluded.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-coblocks-click-to-tweet\"><p class=\"wp-block-coblocks-click-to-tweet__text\">God writes our true r\u00e9sum\u00e9, and he will reveal it in every moment, every conversation, every interaction.<\/p><a class=\"wp-block-coblocks-click-to-tweet__twitter-btn has-button-color\" style=\"background-color:#d19f2a\" href=\"http:\/\/twitter.com\/share?&amp;text=God%20writes%20our%20true%20r%C3%A9sum%C3%A9%2C%20and%20he%20will%20reveal%20it%20in%20every%20moment%2C%20every%20conversation%2C%20every%20interaction.&amp;url=https:\/\/www.navpress.com\/sites\/thedisciplemaker\/how-the-unpopular-girl-taught-me-jesus-love\/&amp;via=NavPress\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Tweet<\/a><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n<p>She wrote a letter to many of her classmates before the Christmas break, telling them what they meant to her and how she would be praying for them over the break. Part of me wanted to applaud her endeavor and another part wanted to shout, \u201cNo! You\u2019re just going to make yourself more of a target. Maybe you should be less of yourself and not more.\u201d (I knew that didn\u2019t sound very wise or counselor-like, so I just silently waited to hear the rest of the story.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Danielle told me about one letter she wrote to a <a href=\"\/how-jesus-sees-my-buddhist-manicurist-and-my-lesbian-friend\/\">girl who came out as gay<\/a> to her classmates the first semester. Her announcement resulted in a lot of teasing, and her parents kicked her out of their home. Danielle explained that she congratulated this girl on her courage\u2014and especially for telling her when she knew Danielle didn\u2019t agree with her values about sexuality.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote\"><p>I thanked her for telling me, even though she knows I\u2019m a Christian, and I wanted her to know that I want to love her and support her. I don\u2019t want her to think God hates her, because I think God especially <a href=\"\/sites\/thedisciplemaker\/2022\/03\/god-who-will-love-me-now-are-you-there\/\">loves <\/a>those of us who are the \u2018unfortunate ones\u2019 in high school. I told her I asked my parents, and they agreed she could stay with us if she ever needed a place to stay.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n<p>Tears welled in my eyes as my respect for this young woman grew. She sat up a little straighter and pulled a piece of paper out of her pocket. She gingerly handed it to me\u2014conveying its inestimable value. Truly, it had been bought with a great price.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I read the note, scrawled in blue ink, blotted in places with what I suspect were tear stains.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote\"><p>Danielle, no one has ever written me an actual letter before!!! Your letter is the best thing that happened to me this year. I also want you to know I don\u2019t hate God and I don\u2019t think he hates me. Because of you. I might not stay at your house, but I definitely want to eat at your table in the cafeteria!!!!<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n<p>In that very moment, I knew how Jesus would answer if anyone asked who was greatest in high school: \u201cTruly, I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven\u201d(Matthew 18:3-4, NIV). For a little child, everything comes by grace, and they have no r\u00e9sum\u00e9. \u201cBecome like one of them!\u201d says Jesus.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Danielle\u2019s incarnational love could silence all the trolls on social media and heal the cancer of fragmentation. She astounded me with the living reminder that God writes our true r\u00e9sum\u00e9, and he will reveal it in every moment, every conversation, every interaction. And the day will come when he will read our r\u00e9sum\u00e9s\u2014which will actually be our stories. I long for mine to sound something like this:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>\u201cYou gave me a cup of cold water.\u201d<br>\u201cI was hungry, and you shared your lunch.\u201d<br>\u201cI was the stranger, the loner at your school; you came and sat with me.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Unexpected grace invites us to let God write our r\u00e9sum\u00e9s:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>You\u2019re blessed the very moment when you\u2019re content with just who you are\u2014no more, no less. That\u2019s the moment you find yourselves proud owners of everything that can\u2019t be bought, and everyone\u2014the liars, addicts, fools, and totally uncool\u2014feels welcome at your table.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-coblocks-author\"><figure class=\"wp-block-coblocks-author__avatar\"><img alt=\"Sharon Hersh\" class=\"wp-block-coblocks-author__avatar-img\" src=\"https:\/\/www.navpress.com\/sites\/thedisciplemaker\/wp-content\/uploads\/HERSH-Author-Photo-bordered.png\" \/><\/figure><div class=\"wp-block-coblocks-author__content\"><span class=\"wp-block-coblocks-author__name\">Sharon Hersh<\/span><p class=\"wp-block-coblocks-author__biography\">is a licensed professional counselor, an adjunct professor in graduate counseling programs, a sought-after speaker, and the author of several books, including\u00a0<em><a rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" href=\"https:\/\/bit.ly\/3i3fKyz\" target=\"_blank\">Belonging<\/a><\/em>, from which you have been reading. <a rel=\"noreferrer noopener\" href=\"https:\/\/bit.ly\/3i3fKyz\" target=\"_blank\">Follow the link<\/a> to engage further or to read the first chapters for free.<\/p>\n<div class=\"wp-block-button\"><a class=\"wp-block-button__link\" href=\"https:\/\/bit.ly\/3i3fKyz\">More from Sharon<\/a><\/div>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large is-resized\"><img src=\"https:\/\/www.navpress.com\/sites\/thedisciplemaker\/wp-content\/uploads\/Belonging_PNG-833x1024.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-8654\" width=\"358\" \/><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I&#8217;m a therapist. My first client for the day was 16 years old. Her year has been one of bone-aching loneliness as she\u2019s tried to find her place among her peers, hang on to her values, and not seem too &#8230; <\/p>\n<p class=\"read-more-container\"><a title=\"How the Unpopular Girl Taught Me Jesus&#8217; Love\" class=\"read-more button\" href=\"https:\/\/www.navpress.com\/sites\/thedisciplemaker\/2020\/10\/how-the-unpopular-girl-taught-me-jesus-love\/#more-8711\">Read more<span class=\"screen-reader-text\">How the Unpopular Girl Taught Me Jesus&#8217; Love<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":12,"featured_media":8713,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_coblocks_attr":"","_coblocks_dimensions":"","_coblocks_responsive_height":"","_coblocks_accordion_ie_support":"","_FSMCFIC_featured_image_caption":"","_FSMCFIC_featured_image_nocaption":"","_FSMCFIC_featured_image_hide":""},"categories":[8],"tags":[71,130,243,258,335,402,460,462],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v20.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>How the Unpopular Girl Taught Me Jesus&#039; Love - The Disciplemaker<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.navpress.com\/sites\/thedisciplemaker\/2020\/10\/how-the-unpopular-girl-taught-me-jesus-love\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"How the Unpopular Girl Taught Me Jesus&#039; Love - The Disciplemaker\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"I&#8217;m a therapist. My first client for the day was 16 years old. Her year has been one of bone-aching loneliness as she\u2019s tried to find her place among her peers, hang on to her values, and not seem too ... 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