Don’t Let the Power of Shame Silence You. Do This Instead.

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This is the fifth post in a six-part series, 6 Barriers to Sharing Your Faith—And How to Overcome Them, taken from the book, Lit Up with Love: Becoming Good-News People in a Gospel-Starved World by Derwin L. Gray. If you like what you’re reading, you can click through to the next post when you’re finished reading this one.

Want to start at the beginning of this series? Start at the first post in the series. This post dives into Barrier #5. It’s based on Lifeway Research and a framework created by Ken Boa and featured in his book, Conformed to His Image (with a change in Barrier #5 from A Barrier of Isolation to Derwin Gray’s A Barrier of Shame, which we dive into in this post).

According to Gray, these barriers aren’t walls; they’re invitations. When you’re lit up with love, you know that barriers are opportunities to press deeper into Christ and rely on the Holy Spirit’s power.

The Barrier of Shame

Early in my faith walk with Jesus, the barrier of shame prevented me from sharing my faith, especially with people who knew me before I followed Jesus. I would think, How can I talk about Jesus when three weeks ago I was partying with this guy? Or if I ran into someone I hadn’t seen since before I knew Jesus, I would think, I can’t share Christ—they knew the old me. The voices in my head were lies from the dark powers who didn’t want me to share Christ. But grace is for people who have a past—like me!

The barrier of shame has become an increasingly significant roadblock to sharing the gospel due to cultural pressures, particularly in certain places in America and Europe. Some of us are ashamed of how some of our siblings in Christ speak and behave. Some of us are ashamed of certain historic, doctrinal beliefs that Christians have guarded for two millennia. Some of us are ashamed of how Christians have treated people in the LGBTQ+ community. Some of us are ashamed of the ways Christianity is sometimes publicly associated with ungodliness like racism or abuse.

Many of these points of shame should indeed cause us to grieve. (Read Matthew 5:4.) We should grieve how our own brokenness and sin, even within the church, has harmed others. But as with many other barriers, when we let this grief become shame, we make it about us, not about God and his message. The Good News of Jesus’ reconciling salvation isn’t something to be ashamed of. We’re not inviting people into an institution—we’re inviting people into a relationship. When you’re lit up with love, you don’t let the power of shame silence you; instead, you let the power of God amplify your voice. I’ll say it again:

Let the power of God amplify your voice.

Once a person who was exploring a relationship with Jesus said to me, “Derwin, throughout history, people who identify as Christians have done horrible things!” They were shocked when I agreed. “Yes,” I said, “some people who say they follow Jesus have done some ugly, ungodly things. Some have done some beautiful, godly things. Ultimately, your salvation is not in people. Your salvation is in Jesus alone.” I am a Christian because Jesus died and rose again. He loves me. He lives in me. He is always been faithful and good to me. I could never be ashamed of Jesus. He was not ashamed of me and my sin when he died so I could live. He boldly and beautifully went to the cross for me. By his grace and his power, I will boldly and (I hope) beautifully go into the world proclaiming his rescuing love.

I am not ashamed of this Good News about Christ. It is the power of God at work, saving everyone who believes—the Jew first and also the Gentile. This Good News tells us how God makes us right in his sight. This is accomplished from start to finish by faith. As the Scriptures say, “It is through faith that a righteous person has life.” Romans 1:16-17

When you’re ready, move on to The Barrier of Time.

Derwin L. Gray

Dr. Derwin L. Gray is the co-founding and lead pastor of Transformation Church (TC), one of the fastest growing churches in America. TC is a multiethnic, multigenerational, mission-shaped community near Charlotte, NC. Pastor Derwin and his wife, Vicki, have been married since 1992 and have two children: daughter, Presley, and son, Jeremiah. He is a bestselling author of several books including The Good LifeLimitless LifeGod, Do You Hear Me?Building a Multiethnic Church, and How to Heal Our Racial Divide.

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